Today is the anniversary of my becoming a mother. It happened a 7:12 AM, The fruit of my 12 hour labor was a 3lbs 13oz, 171/2 inch long, bright red haired girl child. I named her after my mother, who had left us 4 years earlier and her Dad's mother. Isisanne, she was vigorous, pink and full of fire the moment she arrived. Conventional medicine took over as soon as I hit the hospital door, wreaking havoc on me and my precious baby. Many "routine" procedures were done, each one accumulating into a huge ominous cloud that would cast it's shadow often over the next 32 years. My gorgeous girl is fighting for her life on this very day and my poor old body is still paying the price from those well meaning doctors and nurses blindingly performing the "standard of care" procedures in spite of my requests for them to desist. I am saddened and angry that it hasn't changed in over 3 decades, educated and intuitive folks who end up in the health care system today are still in peril and left without choice over what is done to their bodies. My anger isn't fiery and while my sadness sneaks up on me from out the of the deep well of grief that I have acquired over my curious life. We both do what we must to overcome damages done, the perpetrators of the crimes blissfully unaware and happily assured in that they gave "proper" and "appropriate" care to the strange ignorant woman who tried to refuse antibiotics, episiotomy, deep suctioning, premature umbilical cord cutting poisonous blood transfusions of her newly born child and herself. It is the past that reverberates into the present. My prayer today is to live long enough to be an integral part of the change toward a more humane and lovingly respectful health care system. I also pray today that that precious girl that I share this celebration day with lives long enough to see the same and to dance at her grandchildrens weddings if she decides to become a mom, if not I want to know that she will be singing her hauntingly beautiful song until well into her dotage. Pray with me my loving friends.