God must want me to rage right now.

I decided to use this avenue to spew my vitriol out about the most annoying and anger provoking situation that I have had to deal with about Doug's death. Now mind you, I have dealt with tens of organizations from the local newspaper to big financial institutions for the past 3 and a half weeks. But trying to cancel the account for the mp3 player that I bought him for his birthday 3 years ago has brought me to my knees. This far I or someone in my stead has spent no less than 2 hours on the phone trying to cancel the account. The account by the way that charges almost $17.00 a month for the privilege of using this particular Microsoft product. The $16.83 a month gives you the ability to download as much music as you want to any month, the catch is that if you don't sync your Zune with their site every 30 days, you are locked out of your player and all your music goes away. Needless to say, syncing his mp3 player had not been a matter of priority for either of us in the last months of Doug's life, but the 16 days worth of music that he had on it included some songs that gave him great comfort during his suffering. Anyway, I received yet another call yesterday and today from Microsoft after being assured last week that it was all taken care of. The call today that I picked up on voicemail stated that the case against Doug was # so and so and that I needed to fax a power of attorney document to them in order for the case to go forward. Now mind you, I have offered to send them his death certificate several times which they said proves nothing and that for security purposes the POA must be faxed. A 10 page document as opposed to a one page death certificate!! As far as my understanding goes, a power of attorney is probably only in effect for when someone is alive, maybe I am mistaken. Anyway, I am seething with rage at having to spend time on the phone to do a what seems like a fairly straight forward matter, man is dead, won't be using his mp3 player again. I was even told that I could not stop them from removing money from my bank account to pay for their services! I must have pretty good vascular health because the indignant rage that this has caused in me should have popped some sort of vessel gasket if there were to pop. After this morning's phone fiasco, I was assured 5 more times that unless they received the POA by fax that the matter would not be settled. I have disputed the account at my bank, they have even returned the last payment back to my account. If I hear the word "inconvenience" used one more time in reference to Doug's death I will scream in the ear of the poor unsuspecting soul who reads it from their script. I also found out this morning that the medicine man who told Doug that the spirits said he was going to live, had actually been told him that Doug was going to die soon but that the medicine mad felt badly telling him that because Doug wanted to stay alive so much. Would have been nice to avoid 7 weeks of torture that we both endured having had that knowledge, I think. I have heard that all of this has happened for a reason, and that I believe, I just don't get how having 7 extra weeks of life that caused a man who was worn out and who only wanted the truth was worth having to endure agonies that are so horrible to remember because of the lie told to him in that house that night. He would have died sooner but he would have been in his home for the duration and cared for by loved ones while he slipped away from a painless death of kidney failure and having his heart stop beating. A death I would wish on anyone I loved as opposed to having scary, incredibly painful things happen to you over and over again in an institution who considers Death the enemy, instead of the merciful transition from this mortal world to the next. So right now I am filled with such anger that I feel like I should scream and throw things, but I would be screaming at foolishness and throwing things that I might care about later. so I sit and cry instead.